Why is it that your smile is so bright ,
bright enough that I cannot even see
Clinching me in your warm clasp
When all I wanted  was to flee.

Why is it that you're a stoic
with a lax like me,
Why is it that you refrain for my sake,
when you're meant to be a bird set free.

Why is it that you push me towards blithe
when all I ever deserved was abyss,
Shoring me up ,
when I'm unworthy of it.

Why is it that you always endure me
undeterred  of the torment I bestow,
Why is it that you still hold me
even if I  muddle up your flow.

Why is it that you always stand
on brink of disdain,
even if I nudge you away,
Why is it that you always come back to me
when I have no caliber to make you stay.

I don't know why things are as
they are,
maybe you're the spark waiting to burst from abyss,
maybe you're the charm loving to brace me,

Or maybe,
you're the prizzie by omnipotent meant to outspread
euphoria in this tenebrous world
and,
effed mind of mine.

Why is it that you make me smile at
the end of line,
Why is it that your smile is so bright,
bright enough to make me want to feel more
and more,
alive.

                                                                                                        -Monik
(this poem was inspired by series "your lie in april")